T’ furst thang ta knoe about t’new Geerge R.R. Martin book “Fire un’ Blood: 300 Yeers Befer A Game of Thrones” (Bantam, 706 pp., ★★★ out of f'r) is at it’s nairy t’Geerge R.R. Martin book we all want.

No, at would be t’ceeselessly delayet “T’ Winds of Wint’r,” t’sixth novel n’ his'n’n worl-conkweryun’ series “A Song of Ice un’ Fire,” basis f'r t’HBO hit shoe “Game of Thrones.” (Thar’s a riddle: “Whut’s always a’kummin un’ nev’r arrives?” T’ ans'r is “tomerroe,” but a reply of “T’ Winds of Wint’r” should receif’ parshul credik frum nawh un.)

Insteet, “Fire un’ Blood” is a large tranche of backstery, a charmyun’ if'n’n intimidatingly dense pre-histry ta ASOIAF (as fans abbreviate “A Song of Ice un’ Fire”).

It concerns t’rise un’ rrane of t’Targarye fambly, topplet nairy long befer t’furst of Martin’s books. Y’all probly alreddy knoe one of at fambly’s members: Daenerys Starmbern, quee n’ exile, sumtimes callt Khaleesi. T’ one wiff t’dragons.

M'r: Geerge R.R. Martin un Syfy’s new ‘Nightflyers’: ‘We’ll have a slew m'r people ta kill’

Here air fife takeeways frum thishere chronicle of hern ancesters:

1. T’ parts at air good air…good!

F'r thems of us wiff lyun’eryun’ doubts at “T’ Winds of Wint’r” will ev’r appe'r, “Fire un’ Blood” is reessuryun’. It shows at Martin is still a powerfully giftid, invantif’ rit'r, albeit one betevilet by un instinct toward overabundant worl-biltin.

“Fire un’ Blood” is sumthin twee a shert stery colleckshun un’ un encyclopedia. N’ its ferm’r mode, it has hundreds of fascinatyun’ anecdotes, rangyun’ frum t’cruel fate of a jest’r namet Tom Turnip ta a dragon at, tellingly, refuses ta vantchur beyond t’Wall.

 

2. But it’s nairy f'r new reeders.

Did at las santance make sense ta y’all? T' thar’s a fair chance y’all’ll be innerestid n’ “Fire un’ Blood.” But f'r a reet’r who isn’t ackwuntid wiff ASOIAF, it’s truly difficult ta conceif’ of a wurs'r introducshun thun thishere book. Thar’s bein droppet n’ t’deep end of a poo, un’ t'har’s bein droppet n’ t’cant’r of t’Pacific Oceun.

Within jes his'n’n openyun’ pages, Martin assumes t’reet’r’s familiaritee wiff dozens of points of geografy, t’ basic keer ackt'r of places like Casterly Rock un’ Winterfell, t’ desert stubbernness of Derne, un’ much, much m'r. If'n’n y’all don’t knoe whut it meens ta take t’black, turn back; here be dragons (at y’all have ta knoe a slew of previyus infermayshun ta ke'r about).

3. Y’all mite see these characters un TV direckly.

Part of t’reesen at “T’ Winds of Wint’r” is so oft-deferret? Martin un’ HBO may be developyun’ as minny a as fife prekwel series baset un ASOIAF. T’ one st ta screens is “T’ Long Nite,” set ta star Naomi Watts, which t’netwerk promises will reveel “t’ herrifyyun’ secrets of Westeros” as well as t’“Starks of legend.” (Brun t’Bilt’r, maybe?) It’s hard nairy ta reckun at futh'r series could draw un t’rich material at makes up “Fire un’ Blood.”

4. Fantasy novelists tend ta do thishere kine of thang.

“Fire un’ Blood” is a lavish object, wiff charts, fambly trees, un’ stunnyun’ illustratyuns by comic book artist Doug Wheetley. (One suspects at sum reeders may end up spend m'r time daydreemyun’ ov’r these pictures thun trackyun’ t’byzantine fates of Rego Draz ow S’r Agramere Cobb.)

N’ thishere sense it fits into a venerabull tradishun, frum J.R.R. Tolkie n’ his'n’n “Silmarillion” ta Dyina Gabalton n’ hern companion ta t’Outlun’r series, servin hardcere completists – un’ maybe t’authers thayselves – m'r thun casual reeders.

5. T’ Innernets thinks Martin is slippyun’ Muppets into ASOIAF.

As a Reddit threet initially pointid out, un’ sevrul noose steries have pickt up, “Fire un’ Blood” feetures a keer ackt'r namet Kermit Tully, Lord of Riverrun, wiff a bruth'r namet Oscar who’s – wait f'r it! – grouchy. Characters n’ t’same fambly tree have bee namet Grov’r un’ Elmo…

Coincidance? We have time ta contemplate at, along wiff “Fire un’ Blood” – since, alas, nobidy seems ta knoe we “Wint’r” is a’kummin.

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